Safar 27, 1433 A.H, Sunday, January 22, 2012
By Hanif Hammad
In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.
The Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan:
Diapered U.S. soldiers
Safar 27, 1433 A.H, Sunday, January 22, 2012
By Hanif Hammad
In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.
There have been startling reports in the different blogs
and websites and media release circulating around “diaper scarcity” or “the
US-NATO troops in diapers” over the past couple of weeks.
Few days ago, I came upon an amusingly newsworthy report under the title
“diapered soldier” or so that I’d kind of like to share with you.
According to the newspaper reports, the US authorities have quietly and
unofficially requested the Pakistani authorities for the immediate provision of
the tissue paper and pampers in the recent times.
A diplomatic source and press release said that the highly-secured and
well-equipped US-NATO troops can not venture out of the heavily-protected
armored personnel carriers to relieve themselves for the fear of facing
Mujahideen, as a result, the only option the US-NATO troops are left with is to
have on pampers so that they ease themselves comfortably while confronting
Taliban.
To put it simply, the latter choice for the US-NATO in case of lack of diapers
while fighting Taliban would be quite an embarrassing and humiliating one. Can
you imagine what it would be?” pissing their paints during the fight.”!!!
I'll let you into a little secret though; some press release has even revealed
that the US-NATO forces uncontrollably pee in their pants during the fight with
Mujahideen, or for the fear of attack by Taliban.
Mind you, I, for one, guess it is a fairly good idea for the US-NATO forces to
wear diapers without any fear of soiling their uniforms.
So 'Let us not stand between a US soldier and his diaper, as the news reports
put it.
Ansar Abbasi, an eminent writer and editor for one of the newspapers from
Pakistan, The News International has surfaced interesting facts by issuing a
funny column” Pamper (Diaper) Army (US).”
He said the spokesman of ISAf in Afghanistan was contacted regarding this issue
who argued that he was neither a soldier nor did he know that the US Marines and
NATO soldiers wear diapers while fighting their war against Taliban inside
Afghanistan.
Ansar Abbasi further said in his article that US Embassy spokesman Mark Stroh
sent through a mobile SMS, what he called, a “denial” of the reality and The
News story (a brazen denial by Mark Stroh), adding that besides him the Isaf
Deputy PAO Col Gary Kolb could also be cited to have said this.
Since the emergence of the issue of “ diaper crisis faced by US-NATO forces on
the ground and its resulting consequences” the Pakistani authorities have
refused to allow the provision of the US-NATO supplies on an urgent basis.
However, it is believed that the Pakistan government has been advised to
retrieve a large supply of diapers from the Nato containers and urgently send
them to the US forces in Afghanistan which, on the one hand, would be of a
humanitarian assistance; on the other hand, would clear the Pakistan government
further of charges and involvement in the issue. Further delay in supplies by
Pakistani authorities and failure to comply with the US demands may lead to the
emergence of a far more fatally toxic stench in Afghanistan than that of
phosphorus and uranium bombs previously exercised by US which would turn the
sweet-smelling aroma of flowers and roses of the upcoming spring into the smell
of death and mourning!
To tell you the truth, the current Afghan War in connection with the very heated
issue opened up a whole new chapter in the global history from the combative
aspect as there used to be weaponry such as sword, shield, javelin which
developed into gun, artillery. rocket, armored tank, fighter craft, pilotless
plane in the modern sense of the word and so forth, while “ a US soldier wearing
a military nappy” is the most up-to-the-minute term the we have recently come
across for the first time in the world history and his” diaper” is an unusually
extraordinary weapon and armor, isn't it?
It is the destiny of a country with the most modern industry and
state-of-the-art technology worldwide, strange as it may seem.
It reminds me of a well-know Arabic quotation” السیف بالساعد لا الساعد بالسیف”
which, figuratively speaking, indicates that it is the hand that uses the sword,
not the sword that uses the hand ,that is, the actual power behind the sword is
that of a powerful hand, or the sword is of no use without a stronger hand which
leads us to the conclusion that you have to be man enough to use your weapon in
the battle field or will certainly need to use a diaper to help support the
weapon and avoid the side effect.
It is a proven fact that when the faith goes out of some one and belief,
courage, and spirit desert their hearts, the worldly arms and logistic support
would never do them any good. On the other way round, anyone equipped with power
of true faith and spirit of Jihad will single handedly have the entire army
taste embarrassing defeat and humiliation no matter how arrogant and exploitive
it may be.
The likelihood is that the America and her allies, by now, may have realized the
fact their pipe-dream would no longer come true in Afghanistan; they had better
leave our country or they are sure to ask Pakistan for the their soldiers’
coffins, too, along with the toilet papers and diapers.
The Islamic Emirate of Afghanistan